One new text message: ìHeyyy. I’ve been occupied for a while. My brother died today completely unexpectedly. He killed himself. Iím home for a couple of days. Iíd like to talk l8r.”
I had to read the text message a few times before I could comprehend it. In some ways, I still have not.
Suicide is one of those abstract concepts we hear about from time to time, about how important it is to get help you may need or to not be afraid to get help for a friend. To many, itís a statistic, a news headline, a disclaimer on a privacy policy, an aspect of an awareness campaign. One of those things that you canít imagine happening to someone you know.
Within 24 hours, our mutual friends called, texted and Facebooked each other, trying to piece together what happened. We were all in various states of shock, left feeling helpless in the face of the finality of death. Itís a realization that keeps hitting me afresh, again and again, as if I keep walking into a revolving door. I canít even begin to imagine what my friend is going through, losing his older brother and only sibling.
This is the first time Iíve felt personally affected by a young person’s sudden death. Some of Markís (name changed for privacy) friends knew he was feeling depressed, but none thought it was this bad.
Iím writing this in part to help process my own thoughts, but to also reach out to anyone who can at all identify with what Mark was going through.
There are a multitude of resources here at Wooster to help students through the rough patches of college. Iíve made use of many of them over the last three years as Iíve struggled to come to terms with my parentsí divorce. The Wellness Center provides several options for counseling and support groups ó and if what you need is not available at the College, the staff will work with you to find more specialized and accessible resources within the wider community.
The Office of Interfaith Campus Ministries can help connect you with spiritual guidance and support. If youíd rather speak to someone your age, Students Helping Students is a group on campus whose members have been trained to provide guidance relating to dealing with stress, eating disorders, depression and many other areas of health. If problems at home or with friends start interfering with your school work, the Center for Academic Advising, which serves first-years and sophomores, and the Learning Center can help you get back on track with tips for time management, test-taking skills and other academic support.
If youíre worried about a friend, donít be afraid to tell a staff member at the Wellness Center about your concern. If you feel as though there is an immediate danger, donít hesitate to actually take your friend to the Wellness Center. There is a Wooster counselor on call 24 hours a day.
ìAlways remember that somewhere, someone loves you.” A few of us who knew Mark or know his family updated our Facebook status with this quote. Let neither the message nor the loss be forgotten. In memory of MLH. Rest in peace.
Marianne Sierocinski is a first time contributor for the Voice. She can be reached for comment at MSierocinski11@wooster.edu.